"Our wedding was over. I was glad of the event. We had read out a list of people we wanted to thank. I don't actually like reading lists, but we really didn't want to miss anyone out (though we probably did) or to forget that some people did more than one job e.g. my mother had not only paid for many things at the wedding, but worked hard at a night job to send me to a private school, to give me every chance in life, and . . . and bore me into this world etc.
We'll send a thank you note to all our wonderful friends for their gifts when we've opened them, and try to think of them in our new life together as we use their gifts.
That night we were tired, we knew it might not be the best night to start a deeper physical relationship, but we had said "in sickness and in health.." and we couldn't think of a better night or day to start. The rest would be growing it. It turns out that it can't get much worse, so it's only upward from here. We had to laugh, a lot.
But still the best gift I got, more than his surname, the ring, and the honeymoon, was the one that was the focus of his promises. This is the one that pales all others, and one I want to learn to appreciate and use well, and learn to be a quick responder to it. It is not really an it. It my husband himself, as a person, a man, & a husband."
From the genealogies in Gen 4 & 5, I am learning to focus on and be grateful to & for, not just the technologies or mechanism, but on the person(s) who use(s) them.
So as with gifts at a wedding, the happy couple are not trying to minimize anyone's gift, but see (& want everyone else to see, if they can) the obvious trumping of the gift the other one has given them (the gift of themselves) over any other payment, or change, or good thing they have received, even from their new life-partner.
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